


Baby Trouble

by RumbelleForTheWin



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, this fic is corny af
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-24
Updated: 2016-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-16 01:24:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5807887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RumbelleForTheWin/pseuds/RumbelleForTheWin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary: Emma gets a call from a frantic Mary Margaret. The baby is driving her crazy, won’t stop crying, and isn’t sleeping, been to Whale and all they say is the baby’s colicky. Emma has no experience with babies, Hook is out of town trying to get back the Jolly Roger, and right then Regina’s in a meeting for at least another two hours. Who does she call to get advice/help her with the baby.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby Trouble

**Summary: Emma gets a call from a frantic Mary Margaret. The baby is driving her crazy, won’t stop crying, and isn’t sleeping, been to Whale and all they say is the baby’s colicky. Emma has no experience with babies, Hook is out of town trying to get back the Jolly Roger, and right then Regina’s in a meeting for at least another two hours. Who does she call to get advice/help her with the baby.**

_By Snapegirlkmf, Current Artist, RaziOUAT,[@faerietales4ever](http://tmblr.co/mPxmVTvZ69zpe-c8O5UzWnA), 23a, and Outlawqueenftw_

Emma made a very rash decision, and one she would probably regret later, but now, she needed anybody’s help. She pulled out her phone and dialed the number. It rung three times before someone answered.

“Hello?”

“Jefferson, I need your help.”

“Emmaaa..,” he answered in a singsong voice, “What can I do for you?"as he held his cell phone to his right ear as he was cutting the peanut butter and jelly sandwich he was making for Grace.

"Cut the schmoozing Jeff, I need help. Well, actually, Snow needs help. Neal’s colicky and she can’t get him to stop crying. She called me nearly in tears because she hasn’t slept in two days!”

“And, why can’t YOU help her?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

Emma groaned, “Hatter! I’ve never had a baby! I don’t have a clue when it comes to him!”

“You had Henry,” Jeff pointed out.

“Real smart, Jeff! I didn’t raise Henry!” Emma snapped. “Regina did!”

“So ask her.”

“I can’t. She’s in a meeting and my mom needs help now. Do you think you could quit smirking and being a smart ass long enough to help me?”

“Okay, calm down! Uh, has she tried chamomile tea in a bottle? That usually settled Grace down.”

“Really? Let me see if we have any.” Emma rummaged through the tea’s, not finding anything. “There is no chamomile! It’s all mint teas! What am I supposed to do!”

Jefferson sighed on the other end. “I’ll be over in ten.”

Emma was in her apartment when she made the call. Rushing to grab her keys and bag, she flew out the door and ran down the steps to get to the car to drive down to the new home where Mary Margaret and the baby were. As she dashed out the door, she fell onto a person coming up the walk, knocking them down. She groaned.

“Hook! Oh thank god! Come on, we gotta go help Mom with Neal,”

“Lass wh-” But before he could utter an entire sentence, she dragged him to the Bug and shoved him in the passenger seat.

“Grace, you can watch TV till I get back,” Jeff said to his daughter. “I just gotta go bring this tea over to Snow’s house for her baby,” He happened to always have chamomile tea on hand, since he liked to drink it.

“Sure, Dad.”

Jeff ran down the stairs and out to his car. He hopped in the blue Miata and drove over to Snow’s new house, and just as he pulled in the driveway, Emma did also. “Oh good, you’re here!”

Everyone made their way inside. The cries of the baby could be heard from down the block. They all walked inside, and instantly, Snow was upon them. “Thank God you’re here!” She shoved the wailing baby at Emma, her eyes red, with bags below them, and picked up her bag. “I’ll be back.” And with that, Snow left, slamming the door in the faces of three shocked adults.

Emma shook off her shock, rocking the baby trying to hush him as he continued to cry. “Hush Neal,” she cooed to him. Baby Neal, not feeling his mom’s arms around him, only cried louder. Emma looked up at the two men with a pleading look for help.

“Don’t look at me,” Hook said loudly holding his one hand and hook in the air, “Never dealt with a baby.”

Jefferson moved around them to enter the kitchen to start making the tea for the baby.

Emma groaned. “Can you hurry up with that?” she said as she rocked Neal gently.

“I am.” replied Jefferson.

The baby cried out again and squirmed in her arms, “Hook do something!” Emma said desperately.

Hook stared at her. “I told you, I don’t know anything about babies! Swan, I’m a pirate, not a nanny!”

Emma groaned again. She knew she should have paid attention more in home ec when they had the discussion on babies!

Jeff poured the hot water from the kettle into a small mug with the teabag in it.

“Here, here!” Jefferson yelled, stressing out from the cries as he gave it to the baby, to no avail.

“It’s not working!” Hook yelled over the now plain screeches of the child.

“Well you try!” Emma yelled at him, shoving the baby in his arms. All of a sudden, there was silence.

Hook with his good arm was trying to hold onto the baby and placing his hook over the baby so he wouldn’t get hurt with it. Baby Neal looked at the shining hook and cooed trying to get the hook in his hands.

“You got to be kidding me,” Emma cried, watching as the baby settled down as Killian placed his hook closer to the baby’s hands so he could grip it.

Neal made a gurgling noise and pulled the hook closer to his face. “He really likes that hook.” Jefferson stated

“No really?” Emma responded sarcastically and rolled her eyes.

Emma smiled at Neal’s antics before turning to Hook. “Are you sure you don’t know anything about babies?”

“Well…” he trailed off.

Emma raised her eyebrows.

“I used to watch a friend of mine’s kid before I went into the navy. And he liked to play with shiny things . . like my pocket watch. Kinda like a magpie.” Killian said. He clucked to Neal. “Right, baby Magpie?”

Neal made a soft cooing noise. Then he burped loudly …and spit up all over.

“Bloody hell, mate!” Killian yelled.

“Better out, than in?” Emma smiled sheepishly.

Jefferson just laughed, taking the baby, and holding Grace ’s shiny, beaded necklace just out of Neal’s reach, while Emma ushered Killian to go change.

As Killian was walking down the hallway towards the stairs to go to the bathroom, the doorbell rang. Emma rushed ahead of him to see who it was. She groaned.

“Who is it Swan?” Hook asked, stopping at the staircase.

Emma opened the door for Grace. “Is my dad here?” she asked, “I got bored at the house and I wondered if I could help.”

Emma moved out of the way so she could come in. “Jefferson!” she called.

Jeff came to the door holding Neal in his arms. “Hey, you want to join the party?”

Grace smiled. “Sure! Can I hold him?”

“Do you remember how?” her papa asked.

“Of course! I used to practice on my dolls!” she went and took the baby from Jeff. “Hey, sweet one!” she crooned. Neal reached for her shiny earrings. Grace laughed and showed him her bracelet. While the baby looked at that, Jeff handed her the bottle of chamomile and Grace fed him.

“Jeez, she’s better with the kid than I am,” Emma said glumly.

“Don’t worry, the more you watch him the more you’ll get the hang of it,” Jeff assured her.

Grace soon had the baby asleep on her shoulder. “Look, let’s put him in his crib.”

They did, just as Snow walked in. “He’s stopped crying! What did you do?”

“Oh, we found out that Neal just needed some chamomile and next time you need a babysitter-call Hook and Grace!”


End file.
